Hand to God, I thought I loved you.

And here we go again.

You think, by now, I would be used to the fickle nature of my heart and mind.
I just can't seem to let you go. Just as much as I don't want to keep you around.
I was hoping I'd figure it out by now, but of course not. My life isn't that easy.

I don't even think any of it is phasing you. It's like you're oblivious to the fact that I can't decide if I want you here or not. Which is fine with me, I guess. As far as I can tell, you're just going through your days believing I'm as happy in this relationship as you are. I guess I'll bring you down slowly. That's if I ever figure out if I want to.

I think what it is that's got me so confused is the fact that I keep talking to that one guy that I never really got the chance to be with. We're just such great friends and we have so much in common. We understand each other and it's so nice.

Don't get me wrong. I am happy. I'm as happy as someone like me can get. I'm happy here with you, but I can't help but think about being happy somewhere else.